A Reason for Living: How I Know I’m Right Where I’m Supposed to Be

Admittedly, my posts have become sparse the past few weeks with school finals approaching, so I have not been able to give proper justice to the dozens of DIY projects, tips for saving money and recipes that I have in my head, just waiting to explode onto the page. I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want to share this week. Since I’ve tended to veer toward the thriftily side of Thriftily Domestic in my posts up to this point, it might come as a surprise to know that I find the domestic side of life to be exponentially more important.

For me, without domestic, there is no thriftily. The two are intertwined so perfectly and destined to remain side-by-side. So I’ve decided to take some time today to talk a little bit about one of the things in my life that I am most thankful for.

His name is John. Not only is he my husband (2 months and counting), but he’s my partner in life. And yes, I definitely just paraphrased part of our vows. But I digress…

He is the person I see when I first open my eyes in the morning and the last person I see before I close my eyes at night. Sometimes I even see him in my dreams. He is my rock, my teammate, my soul. In fact, he’s my destiny.

I often think back to when we first met and our friendship began. I was a broken-down shell of a human, self-destructive as all hell, and he was a typical 19-year old guy, living a typically 19-year old life. Our lives couldn’t have been more different. And to this day, I still wonder what made him ever – and I mean EVER – decide to stick around.

I guess the reason doesn’t even matter. What DOES matter is that he helped me save myself. Even when I was beyond the reaches of anyone’s help, he still somehow managed to make a difference. He gave me the space that I needed to get well. My family and friends gave me space too, but they knew me. They knew who I really was. John had just met me, yet he did not leave. He chose to stay and I owe him everything for that.

I got my life back on track and we started dating. And here we are, 10 years after we first met, married and happy and excited to start the rest of our lives. We’re a team now. We face the world each day, together. The versatility that John demonstrates is both inspiring and humbling. When I needed space, he gave me space. Now that I need affection and interaction, that is exactly what he is giving me. It’s like he can read my mind and predict what I want and need before I even know myself!

So what does this have to do with being domestic?

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines domestic as “relating to or involving someone’s home or family”. In that case, this has EVERYTHING to do with being domestic.

I’m a wife now. And I hope to be a mother someday. John is my family. He is my purpose and the reason I go to work each day. I go to school to further my education in hopes that it will benefit us in the future. When I use my research and thinking-outside-of-the-box skills to find various ways to save us some money here and there, I am doing it because of him. He makes me want to be a better person and to make us a better team.

Sometimes I sit in bed at night after he falls asleep and I just watch him (he’s going to think I’m so creepy when he reads this!). I’m thankful for meeting him. Thankful for falling in love with him. Thankful for wanting to be with him and be happy so much so that I called “time out” in my own life, stood up, dusted myself off and CHANGED EVERYTHING.

I’m domestic now. But the even more remarkable thing is that I can see John is starting to join me. This does not make him any less of the grizzly, manly man that we all know him to be, but rather it shows that we are growing together. Every single thing that we each do now affects the other. Yes, it is going to take some getting used to. But I know that we can handle it because I know what we’ve been through.

I may never know the reason that John stood by me through it all. Maybe I don’t ever want to know. Whatever it was, it brought us together and that is the only thing that matters to me. We took what life handed us and made it our very own. Sometimes we struggle, but we support each other. I am so thankful for John and everything that he stands for. If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I would be now, my answer would probably have been “dead”. Now, all of these years later, looking back, I finally know that I am exactly where I am supposed to be: married to my hero and soul mate, and rockin’ the thriftily domestic life!



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